buried in a pile of blessings...

That's how I feel today.  I told you about being so happy that my baby son has found the girl who seems to literally complete him.  How much my husband and I love her already, how we can look back and see how God Himself placed her in our lives.  She feels like that missing piece in our puzzle.

Yesterday was an odd sort of Sunday.  For the past almost 6 weeks, Our Girl has been coming to church with us.  Baby Son joined the church last Sunday, which overjoyed us, of course.  It's been a hard couple of years worshipping & serving The Lord apart from our children.  But we see how God is using our First Baby Boy to minister to the youth in another church in his wife's hometown.  We are thankful that God didn't call him to a place far away from us because I'm not sure that this poor mama could have stood the pain of them leaving us & living so far away.  

But our Baby Son hadn't made up his mind yet where he wanted to make his church home.  The last church we all belonged to for many years, well, I think I talked about it in a previous post...  so I won't repeat it now, but needless to say, we were thrilled to be able to sit in a church service with one of our sons, and now, with his sweet girlfriend as well. 

So, yeah, we had this great early service, then Baby Son came with one of the young boys that spends a lot of time with the boys, came to the second service.  

I got involved in a conversation with a lady from our Emmaus community & found out she had a prayer need involving her husband who is a recovering alcoholic.  Then another lady, both of them were serving as greeters that day, from our Emmaus community came over, and the three of us talked for awhile, then the first lady decided she'd better go so her husband wouldn't think she was talking about him so the second lady and I talked for some time.  Hubby was outside talking to some other people.

This lady began to share about "randomly" (ha! nope, totally God's will!) being put in the path of a man she'd met before through the counsellor at our church.  This man was suicidal at that time, & this morning when our care pastor brought him to this lady, she recognized him.  She was asking for prayer for him.

Then, Hubby came back in looking for me, and this lady wanted to talk with him about the man and see if he had any ideas for getting the man involved with some other Godly men who would hold him accountable & check on him, etc.  We had a prayer for the man and (woo!! chill bumps!)  God just met with us and it was like we had another church service while in the auditorium, the second service was taking place.   :)

Hubby ended up getting to talk to the man, because we stayed and waited for second service to let out so we could talk to our son, too.  This particular Sunday, Our Girl had gone to her home church to try and get some resolution about where she should be attending church.  

Baby Son was planning to go with her, but one of the other boys who spends a lot of time with my kids got sick and called Baby Son to come get him... yes, instead of caling his parents, he called my son.  

What a great testimony to how my children are ministering to these kids.  So, Our Girl and Baby Son had gone to pick up this boy, they tended to him for some time before Our Girl left for home.  She will be an RN after her graduation this May, so it was so good she was there!

So back to our Sunday... our First Baby son was out of town with his wife for their FIFTH ANNIVERSARY!!!  Goodness, that seems like such a long time, but at the same time, not long at all.  So anyway, it was just me, Hubby, Baby Son & Our Girl and the boy who'd come to church that morning.  

We sat in Subway, eating our late supper after going to an amazing singing service at our church that evening... and we started talking... and the subject turned serious as it related to Baby Son & Our Girl...  when it got to the point where she and I were both about to cry, we decided to head home to finish our talk. 

We had let her know that, due to some thick tension in her family, that she was more than welcome to move in with us if she wanted. Or she was welcome to stay for a night or two, whatever she needed.  We were letting her know we meant it, we hadn't had second thoughts about it and how much she means to us... how much we view her as our own daughter.

She said while at Subway that she was working up the courage to tell us something, so that's when we headed home.  Once we got home, she proceeded to tell us how much she felt like a part of our family, how Hubby and I had filled a sort-of void she had for a close relationship with her parents & and we all talked about the future.  It was a great time and then the boy who had gotten sick came back...

The other boy, who had been with us at Subway, asked about hearing Our Girl's testimony, because she'd mentioned wanting to tell it to the boys because she felt it would help them or at least let them know that she knew what they were dealing with.

So, she and Baby Son drove back to his house, where she had left a hard copy of her testimony with him to read, and she came back up and read it in the firelight.  I had heard it before at Emmaus, but Hubby hadn't.  We all sat in silence as she stood on the other side of that firepit, with Baby Son's arm around her shoulders for support while he shined a light on the paper for her.  It was such a sweet time of fellowship and love.

I am just completely buried in this big pile of blessings and sometimes it makes me scared that something really bad is coming.  That there's no way my life can be this full of God's love without something in the future that will rob me of these blessings.  Or that maybe God is "blessing me up" before a time of struggle and trial.  

I honestly don't know, but I am not going to spend my time worrying about the future.  If I have learned nothing else during this time of God teaching me about what fear really is and that it should have no affect on me, I have learned to appreciate each and every blessing and not diminish the goodness of them by worrying about things that haven't happened yet, or may never happen at all.

How silly!   So, if you need to find me, look under that great big pile of God's love and behind this big doofusy grin.  I'll be there.

Blessings to you!

five things...

Okay, so I have been watching the DVD we got from our church's community groups director today. There are basically six sermons with discussion questions and WOW... there is so much to glean!!

I have never really listened to Andy Stanley before, but I like him. He is much like our own pastor, but not quite as dramatic. LOL! The DVD is called Five Things That Grow Your Faith. You can probably get most all of the materials online, even the messages included on the DVD.

Check it out if you are a small group leader or are considering becoming one!

community...

I think I shared here how my hubby and I became the "leaders" of our church's community group. A community group is what most people refer to as "small group" or "accountability group". If not, well, we joined the group right after we finished a 6-week course that was basically a church-info thing. The church we attend is huge & definitely qualifies as a "mega church" in this area. But it's so radically different from any other traditional church in our area, they used to have this short "class" of sorts to let people understand the what's & why-fore's about the church. However, it was entitled "Next Steps" and some folks thought it was for new Christians. We're hoping they will start it back up all new & improved because it was a big help to us and let us ask questions we had about the doctrine and practices of the church before we joined.

So after the Next Steps group, we joined a group that, at the time, the pastor was a part of. That's before our church expanded to a second campus in the next town and his wife started her internship at the hospital in a town 80 miles away and they began a life of residing in two different places, travelling many miles every week! The group grew so large that it split at one point, then they broke for summer vacation. After that, when it was announced that groups would start meeting again, we and two other couples showed up at the usual room but no leader was to be found. Someone said they were still on vacation. We didn't know for sure, hadn't had any word from them, but we had one new couple there, so we just carried on as usual, discussing the sermon notes. The next week, the same thing happened... the man who had previously led our group wasn't there and a different new couple had come to join us.

After that second week, I emailed the guy who oversaw Community Groups to let him know what we'd been doing, to ask where the leader was & to find out if the group had moved or something. The reply I got was an apology for letting that happen, and a congratulations for "stepping up" and notice that we would now be listed as the group's "leaders".

Egads!! I wasn't expecting that! It made Tommy a bit uneasy because he didn't see himself as any sort of church leader, but after praying about it and talking it over with a couple of his friends, we took it as something the Lord wanted us to do, and plunged ahead.

At that time, the church staff started working on plans to "do" community groups in a more methodical, organized way. And so here we are, almost a year later with Tommy's supervisor at work (& a dear friend now) being appointed the new community groups' coordinator and getting ready for an event called "Group Link" next Sunday evening.

As I understand it, it'll be like a sort of job fair for Community Groups. People will be scattered around the large "foyer" area, representing their group and folks can wander around asking questions and getting info about any particular group they think will fit their schedules and interests.

We've been given a book and a DVD about leading and "running" community groups to be the most efficient and most helpful to folks. Of course, this would have to have happened the same time we started taking a 10-week Christian financial course, too. *sigh*

We have GOT to get busy reading the information. I'm praying it will be helpful. It seems that in the past the biggest problem, or one of the biggest, was having info about the various groups since most meet outside the church and on various days and various times. Hopefully, setting up one person to be in charge of groups info this way will help eliminate that. And they plan to have these Group Link events at least four times per year.

The suggestion is to have around 6-8 people per group, then to close that group. That way you promote community and build trust. And we have found that to be so since our group has been meeting at the church on Sunday evenings, we tend to "catch" people who have been looking for a group or who don't know that our church doesn't have a traditional service on Sunday nights. It's been good to be able to let these people join in, but in about 99% of the cases, our group is not what they want or need. Either the age range is off, the interest or life stage is incompatible or something. And they leave. Of course, with our core group of folks, we're not as forthcoming or spend the time explaining things to the new person and don't get to delve as deeply into things as we normally would.

I'm just praying that, as it looks like we may be losing the two couples who have been the core of our group (due to changing job situations, etc) we may be starting from scratch and that makes me a little uneasy. You don't realize how much you've come to depend on a close relationship with others in your group til you're about to lose them. But I guess God's got something else in store for us and I'm confident that He will place the right people in our group.

The last thing I'll mention is the fear I have, well, more of a concern, but still something I need to overcome, of having people in our group that we have trouble connecting with. Sometimes you get folks that you just can't "click" with and you stay unsure of for one reason or another. Sometimes they seem oblivious to this situation or sometimes they seem to feel the total opposite that you do and want to cling tightly to you... all the while, you're trying your darnedest to meet their needs while still feeling "out of sync" with them.

*sigh* I'm praying God settles this for us too. And I'm sure He will... I just hope it's not by bringing us a whole posse of people we feel non-comfortable with. LOL! Wouldn't that just be the way to teach us, though?

Ha. Thanks for reading... I'll keep you posted on how this goes!

Blessings!

judgmental...

of or denoting an attitude in which judgments about other people's conduct are made

1. Of, relating to, or dependent on judgment: a judgmental error.
2. Inclined to make judgments, especially moral or personal ones: a marriage counselor who tries not to be judgmental.

Don't we all know them? Judgmental people. And, for the most part, don't we all despise that quality? I know I do.

Did you know the word judgment is used 235 times in the ESV (English Standard Version) and 408 times in the KJV (King James Version)? The word judge is used 226 times in the ESV and 286 times in the KJV. The word judgmental is used zero times in either of those versions of the Bible. Maybe that's because man sort of created that word AND its meaning.

Our pastor has been doing a series of sermons he calls "Things People Hate About Christians". LOL! How do ya like that? It's been an awesome series. This is something I really appreciate about our pastor... he takes on topics that, if you grew up in a traditional Protestant church, you always wondered about but either you knew not to ask, or you did ask and wasn't given a real answer. He comes from a "religious" background: grew up in a Baptist church, his dad was a deacon, his family was always at every church service & always active in church activities. That's basically me. And it's also a lot of other people, or at least close to it.

So he tackled these issues and it's SO refreshing to hear honest answers, even if they're not comfortable to hear. For instance, one of the sermons in this series was Hypocrisy. Oooh, that stung, didn't it? He also talked about Judgmental attitudes.

Ouch. He didn't just brow-beat us about being judgmental, but he showed us that judging things, and yes, even people (by their actions (fruit) was Biblical, however, he pointed out very eloquently & logically how we should not judge "outsiders", those who are not part of the Body of Christ, in the same way we judge "our own", the "insiders", the Christians.

It's unfair to judge people who make no claims to follow Jesus in the same way we judge (or ascertain their spiritual health by what we see in their lives) people who claim to know Jesus and have made Him the Master of their lives. And when you boil it down, that IS where a lot of churches today have it seriously wrong.

For instance, I read from a local man how the preacher at his church had basically run off a couple who'd started coming there, telling them that because they were living together outside of marriage, they were not welcome.

*mouth gapes open, eyes wide* How's that for agape love? Sheesh!

Now, I am willing to admit that a few years ago, that would have been my sentiment. Yes, I grew up with the mindset that everyone knows the Bible, knows they are living in sin, and should know enough to "clean themselves up" before coming to church.

But where in the Bible does it say this or even HINT that anyone can or should try to "clean themselves" before approaching God??? Doesn't scripture teach the exact opposite of this? Don't our very hymns say, Just as I am, without one plea...??? And What can wash away my sin? Nothing but the blood of Jesus...???

How can we get them to Jesus if we ban them from the church because they're not "living right" or whatever?? Good grief!! I've seen this happen over and over in my life. Matter of fact, in one very legalistic (judgmental) church we found ourselves in many years ago, our family was a victim of this kind of thinking. Only they were judging us, supposed "insiders", according to some additional pastor-created rules that were entirely unBiblical. Thank God we got out of there. That was one of the worst times in my life as these people literally tried to drive a wedge between my husband and myself over their self-righteous man-made rules.

*puke*

I know of at least two other families, very "high up" in this church who came out of it with broken families and deep emotional, spiritual scars. How very sad. I'm so thankful we didn't end up that way. But let me tell you, it was not easy and it was not without the Hand of God moving in our lives.

I get annoyed when someone wants to start a "debate" about Christianity and first thing they do is throw out the "Who are you to judge me?" argument. These people are in serious denial and/or have been victims of some "salt-bombing" (I'll explain that one later) harsh, misguided Christian who told them all about the many rules they were breaking as if they (the victim) should know better.

2 Chronicles 19:5-6 tells us about Solomon appointing judges in the land to decide disputes among the people. And in these particular scriptures, he's telling them to be wise because they are not working for men, but for the Lord. Oh, if our judges today took their jobs as seriously as these men probably did!

I always feel the need to point out that the Bible does NOT tell us as Christians that we are not to judge. How else are we to know what is right or wrong if we don't use our God-given minds to judge between the two? It does, however, tell us

In 2 Corinthians 13:5-6, Paul tells us to "test ourselves", and I believe that means not only our own personal self, but also those who are "like us", ie: saved by grace, a professing Christian:

Examine yourselves, to see whether you are in the faith. Test yourselves. Or do you not realize this about yourselves, that Jesus Christ is in you?—unless indeed you fail to meet the test! I hope you will find out that we have not failed the test.

God is the Ultimate Judge of the whole world. Psalm 9:7-9 tells us

"But the Lord sits enthroned forever;
he has established his throne for justice,
and he judges the world with righteousness;
he judges the peoples with uprightness.
The Lord is a stronghold for the oppressed,
a stronghold in times of trouble."

And Ezekiel 24:14 tells us

"I am the Lord. I have spoken; it shall come to pass; I will do it. I will not go back; I will not spare; I will not relent; according to your ways and your deeds you will be judged, declares the Lord God.”

That should make us take very seriously the way we live our lives, the way we treat others, how generous we are with the needy, how kind we are to the hurting...

We need to realize that our behavior affects our influence with those who are watching. Never think no one is watching you. There's ALWAYS someone watching us. Either to see if we'll succeed or to see if we'll fail. It doesn't matter if we rise or fall, they will be watching how we react to everything that happens in our lives. React with the knowledge that Jesus is in control, no matter what happens. And please, remember we as Christians are here to bring people to Christ and we can't do that if we are repelling people by being judgmental.

Blessings!

hover...

I just read a post by a dear friend of mine. She was talking about how God seemed to be wanting her to "be still" while back here on Earth, her three young boys were running around, the laundry needing doing, dishes needed washing and meals needed cooking. Oh, how I remember those days.

It's so funny now that my children are young adults to look at moms with young children. I always say something like, "Don't blink. They will be grown before you know it." Part of the time, they will look at me like I'm a loon as they are tired and ragged and worn out from trying to keep up and keep it all together.

But seriously, young moms, DON'T BLINK!!! Their childhood will be over all too soon. Mark my words.

So back to Brandi's post, she obeyed the Holy Spirit and did spend some quiet time praying and she shared about all the different people she prayed for.

The list was impressive. Not because it was long or contained 'the' most tragically needy persons, but because it was MASSIVE in its scope.

She mentioned the soldiers who are willingly defending our freedoms, the persecuted who are being targeted or imprisoned for their faith, the orphans, the homeless, the starving...

I don't know about you, but when I start to think about all these people who NEED, some in DESPERATE need, our prayers it makes me feel...

What?

Overwhelmed. I feel like I can't pray for all those people. And if I do, since I don't "know" them personally, that it's not doing much good. Sometimes a particular group comes to mind, for instance abused children... and in my mind, it seems so useless to say, "God, watch over and protect these children." But is it? I KNOW I serve a God Who is well able to do what I just asked, but somehow, to my fleshly mind, it seems so inadequate.

As I'm mulling this over with a new perspective, I wonder if perhaps when I pray such a prayer, maybe there is one certain child out there who needs an intercessor. What do you think? Do you think such 'vague' prayers are "assigned" to people like that?

I dunno where this train of thought is coming from and whether it upsets me more or eases my mind. *hmph!*

I mean, if I sincerely pray for "children" but in actuality there's one child who "gets" the benefit of that prayer... well, is that fair??

*chuckle* I'm disturbing myself now. Good grief!! I have honestly never thought about it that way before.

Guess I need to do some study.

And speaking of study, since I can't seem to write one post on one topic...

I think I've told you about how the hubby and I became community group leaders at church a few months ago, right? Well, after several months, the church offered a "Covenant Marriage" course that we thought would be helpful and since our group is all married couples, we just decided to 'take' the whole group to this 6 week course.

That was a disaster. First of all, the course wasn't quite what we'd thought it was going to be. It was geared more towards couples who didn't have a decades-old marriage. Some people hated it and let us know.. and consequently, never came back to the group!

Others merely didn't like it and didn't attend the class. But they did come back once we went back to our regular meetings.

Now the church is offering a financial study, Navigating Your Finances God's Way from Compass. We were not planning to attend at all. After the last disaster, we just didn't even consider it, even though the two other couples who are core members (they're almost always at group) were planning to attend.

It started this past Sunday night, and we were there in case anyone else showed up expecting to join out group. But no one did, so at the insistence of the other couples, we went into the room where the finance class was being held.

We didn't realize there would be curriculum to purchase, but we paid for the two books and put our names on the list. It seemed as if maybe God had other plans for us in this.

So, we are now doing the homework for this course. We're reading the book Your Money Counts by Howard Dayton. It's a great book. Just reading it without the other book would be a good idea for anyone who's not as good with their money as they ought to be AND who wants to handle their money according to scripture.

Hubby and I are both feeling like it was God's plan for us to be in this class, even though it's planned to be 10 weeks long!! God will work it all out.

I gotta hit the sack now. It's almost 2 am!! Guess this is what I get for going to bed at 8 pm! *shrugs*

Blessings!

do not be deceived...

I sometimes get caught up in, if you will, the conspiracy "theory" that there are forces at work in the world today that seek to put in effect a "n ew w orld o rder" that will seat on a throne an inherently wicked and evil "one" to be worshiped by the masses of humanity to its (humanity's) utter and final destruction.

Um, okay, yeah... I believe that. Say what you will about it, but Revelation and some En d Tim e theorists have it right. This world will end one day before we know it, and as Scripture indicates, "no man knows" when. (Mark 13:32 & Matthew 24:36)

However, we can use the Holy Bible to interpret events in the world and the many prophecies contained in God's Word, the Holy Bible, to prepare our hearts and minds, or more likely - especially in my case, calm our hearts and minds when we see these things happening around us.

God is not to be mocked and moreover, the Bible states that He "is not", in other words, He's already got this under His control & Authority. No matter how many "men" (meaning: humans) shout disparaging comments or statements about my God or my Savior, Jesus Christ, in the end, God IS NOT MOCKED. (Galatians 6:7) This scripture tells us that when a man (again, meaning human) smears the name of God or Jesus, he is sure to reap the consequences in the end. Don't be fooled just because lightening didn't strike you down that you got by with mocking God.

I'm posting a link to the video I just watched. It's about 2.5 hours long, so be sure you have the time before you start it. If you're like me, you won't want to pause it for anything. This is one of the best videos of its kind that I've seen because it is very factual & full of references and quotations. But also, it does not leave you with all of this "bad news" and come to an end. It offers the one and only solution to the trials to come: Jesus Christ! I had never seen a "documentary" such as this that ever offered the watcher a remedy for all the gloom that comes with an end times study or research.

NWO & demons Explained
I firmly believe that the culture of today is ripe for introduction of the anti-christ. Do I propose to know who he is? No, of course not. But I do see quite clearly that our society is more than ready for him.

If you watch the video I posted, you'll see what I mean. At least this is what I am convinced of. I think today's eager acceptance of things like vampires, zombies and aliens makes us super-sheeple, ready to believe anything or anyone who can do anything that could be considered "super - nat ural". We are bombarded with images, television shows, movies and books about all these things. Take the latest fascination with movies & books like Twilight or the Harry Potter series. There are tons of shows on these days about ghost hunters, ufo abductees and spirit-channeling mediums. And they are largely accepted at face value, as gospel truth.

And I'm not telling you they are not real.

Yep, you read that right. I'm not saying those things are not real. Because I believe they are, however, I do not take it all at face value. I believe these things are so popular and so a part of the culture because the heinous force behind all that is evil is preparing the world to gobble up the things he will present as proof of his "power".

Please don't think I'm proposing that I am an authority of any kind on this topic. I'm not, but at times, I do get very interested as I see things happen around me that clearly pave the way to usher in an evil "kingship". And I fear for those who follow these things, those who see no harm in it, who consider the deception to be fact... in short, I fear for the lost souls who are eating up this culture of the su per- nat u ral.

If you decide to watch the video, we'll chat about it if you want to leave a comment.

aw, crap!

I guess I might have overdone it yesterday. At least I hope that's what it is. I have been exhausted today. Completely wiped out! *sigh* I guess I got my hopes up a little bit too soon. And that's not a new thing to me. My poor mother, love her heart, has always griped at me for "doing too much". She could never understand why I insisted that when I felt good, I HAD to do as much as possible. Which in years past, involved doing all sorts of stuff for my boys during our homeschooling years.

I never understood how she, the woman who, to this day, will run herself ragged doing for others, couldn't see why I felt it was my duty to do all I could for my boys. She is of the opinion that my health issues should take presedence. I know she is concerned because I am, after all, still "her baby", her firstborn. But she has trouble I guess seeing me as a mom too. Funny how that is, even when her only grandchildren, my two sons, and my daughter-in-law (!) are grown and on their own now... I'm still her little girl. My mommy is so funny that way. And I love her for it, but it sometimes makes me crazy. *heh*

So now my boys are grown and I'm not the homeschool mommy anymore and I don't often have to put myself out very much. I like to be involved in our church and of course in our Emmaus community. That's really my whole life besides my family. With my daughter-in-law working now, and all of the kids working so much with the teens at their church, we don't get together with them as much these days.

Anyhow, seems I maybe overdid it yesterday & now I'm drooping a bit. But the hubs & I have a leadership workshop at church in the morning and we're suppose to help set up, so I need to have my big ol' butt in the bed because 7 am comes early... a whole heckuva lot earlier than noon, right?

God bless!!

it's cool being a tool...

A tool of God, that is. That's what my hubby and I had the honor of being this past Sunday. It was snowing and had been during the night, so there was enough snow on the ground to make most churches cancel services. Yes, I know, it doesn't take much and believe me, it wasn't much, but it was enough to get on top of your shoes if you walked through the grass.

Since our truck is not a four-wheel drive, we decided not to take the hilly road we usually do to church. We went around a longer way and were headed down the parkway. I was fooling with my phone and didn't see her, but Tommy suddenly said, "I bet that woman is freezing to death." I looked up but didn't see anyone. Then he slowed down & said, "I wonder where she's going. I should have stopped and picked her up." He asked me if I thought so. I told him it was up to him since I hadn't seen her.

So he turned the truck around and soon I could see her. All humped over with a Army jacket on, jeans and tennis shoes...walking in the field, so I knew her feet had to have been soaked & frozen.

Tommy pulled over, rolled down his window and hollered, "Would you like a ride?" She said yes, she would and she was just going to the little grocery store at the gas station about a 1/4 mile down the parkway. We drove there & Tommy told her if she wasn't going to be too long, we'd just wait and drive her back home if she wanted. She gratefully said okay and jumped out of the truck.

I was struggling with feeling "put upon" and feeling guilty for it. I was supposed to work in child care during the second service and it was looking like we were going to be late for first service, especially if we took this lady home, too.

It wasn't long before she came back out and we were on our way to take her home. It turned out that she lived just off the road we live on, about a mile and a half from us. We were almost out of gas, too and had planned to make a stop for fuel after church but driving the extra distance, we were going to have to stop before going to church and soon, according to the fuel gauge.

Once we got to her house, which turned out to be a rough-looking single-wide trailer that she said had been divided in half, so she was renting half of it. She'd told us that she had just moved in Friday. She said she'd went with "this guy" to pick up some furniture the homeless shelter had given her and on the way back home, they stopped at a liquor store. She told us later that he had gotten violent. She did have a cut lip. She had called the police, so the man was now in jail. As Tommy pulled up, he started asking if she would want to go to church with us, but he never even got the question out before this lady said, "Yes, I would love to go to church with you!"

She insisted on changing clothes, so we turned off the truck while she went inside the trailer. Yes, the fuel was getting that low. While she was changing, I texted the lady at church to tell her I wouldn't be able to work in child care. We didn't think it was a good idea for Tommy to be alone in second service with this lady we'd just met. The woman at church agreed with that and said they'd handle things without me that day.

The sermon and worship music was awesome and perfectly suited for her that morning. She said she loved it and would love to go with us again. We told her it'd be a pleasure to pick her up since she was right on our way anyway.

She called me Monday wanting to know if I had a flat screwdriver and hammer she could borrow. Apparently she'd got a ride to town with someone to get groceries and to take her by the jail. She said the guy who'd beaten her Friday had her key in his pocket when he was arrested and now she was locked out of her trailer because he wouldn't sign the key over to her. At that time, Tommy was gone in the only vehicle we have, so I had no way to drive down there. She said her landlord wasn't home so she couldn't get in.

I didn't know what else to do since I couldn't help her. She apparently must have waited til her landlord was back and got them to let her in.

I called her Tuesday to see if she wanted to go to Celebrate Recovery at our church. She told me she was back at the homeless shelter in the next town over. When her landlord had let her in, she saw the damage done by the guy, apparently she ran into the bathroom to get away from him and he'd torn the door off its hinges. So the landlord had kicked her out.

She seemed to be okay. She told me she was reading the devotional book given to her by our church as a first-time visitor gift. I told her to stay focused on Jesus and to keep me posted with what was going on with her.

I don't know what God meant or us to do for her, Christina, but I hope we didn't fail Him. I'm not sure why she went to the shelter in the neighboring town, instead of the one here. It was amazing though, to watch God work.

First, we never go that way to church. We usually take a much shorter route that would have completely bypassed where Christina was when we passed. Also, she told us she had felt such an urgency to "hurry" and go to the store when she had all day to get there, but she had felt an urge to hurry and thankfully, she gave in to that. Why did we have this encounter with her? I'm not sure, but perhaps we were merely the sowers and someone else will come along and water and someone else then will reap a harvest in her life.

But wow... how cool to be a tool in the hands of such an awesome God!!

encouragement...

Almost 2 years ago, my husband & I joined what a lot of people around here refer to as a mega-church. We'd thought it was that ourselves, til we went. We ended up there because 1) we were running late one Sunday morning and 2) we'd watched some of the sermons online and were intrigued & surprised to find that the messages from a church that big were entirely Biblical and doctrinally sound. So, what was a place to go in a pinch became our new church home. It was like God picked us up with two fingers & plopped us down there, just exactly where He wanted us.

We got to know the pastor and many people on staff. We became active in serving in several of the church's many ministries and several months ago, we found ourselves the newly appointed leaders of our Community Group!

I tell people we "accidentally" ended up there, but I know that God doesn't do accidents, or maybe He just makes use of them for His purposes. :)

The former leader wasn't at the first couple of meetings after summer break, which left just us and two other couples who had joined the church around the same time we had. We continued on with the meetings because, well, we enjoy them so much and those two "leaderless" meetings found us with new folks in attendance.

So I sent an email to a couple different staff members asking what was up and letting them know what had been going on. I received back a note saying basically, "Great! We put you and Tommy down as this group's leaders! Thanks for serving!" LOL! My first thought was that the other two "core" couples would think we'd angled for the position and my husband's first thought was, "Oh, no! I can't do that!"

We prayed about it, we talked to the other couples so they knew what had happened...and at last, God gave Tommy a peace about it.

Then last night, He gave us both an encouraging situation to, I feel, let us know we're right where He wants us.

We had one new fella show up. His wife had to work, and so he was on his own, which was fine. We have some "singles" in our group from time to time. The church encourages people to go to several different groups to see where they feel most comfortable.

Our group is amazing. As I said, there are us three couples who make up the core, who all serve in the church's First Touch ministry (greeting, parking, seating, etc... no one feels unwelcome at our church!) and we're pretty much always there when something's going on at the church. All that to say, we're a very chatty group, everyone participates in the discussion. I think that has always made new folks feel at ease to share with us, even though most of the time, they don't come back, for whatever reason... sometimes it's just that they are not consistent.

So anyway, after everyone, and I mean EVERYone.. even the custodian, had left last night, Tommy and I continued to talk with this gentleman. He'd opened up about his biggest sin-struggle and shared that it had caused hurt in this, his second marriage. We also found out that he had attended our former church, so we had that in common, along with having close friends who still attend there.

But we continued to talk, and he continued to open up about his life. We encouraged each other. He's working to redeem himself in his wife's eyes. That's a hard thing to tell ANYone, but he felt comfortable telling us. We stood outside the church, huddled under an overhang because it was raining and talked for almost an hour.

It was a real blessing to us.

What was?-- you might ask. Being an encouragement to someone, having someone feel comfortable enough to confide in us, to ask us to pray for them. It was a great blessing. And it was more confirmation that we're where God wants us.

That's what we want more than anything. To be exactly where God wants us. Sometimes that's hard to determine so it's just beautiful when God gives you a sign that you're on the right path. :)

Do we feel at a loss sometimes? You bet we do!! Do we feel we haven't or can't do what we need to or be what we need to be? Yes! Being where God wants you doesn't make you perfect. It just makes you feel safe... even when the sky seems to be falling around you.

He's awesome that way.

God bless you big time!!

long time, no post...

Ah, yes. I'm back. My life got a little hectic during the holidays. I'm sure yours wasn't though, right? Mmhmm.. I didn't think so.

Our family had a beautiful Christmas, even though this was one of the tightest financial times of our lives. None of the family really had the extra money to do our usual week at the cabin, and we are just out of the habit of trying to buy everyone gifts... besides the fact that we just flat had no money to do that with.

*sigh* Yeah, it's a little depressing, but God kept us busy & we didn't focus on what we didn't have.

So, let me tell you what we did have...

We had two non-family get-togethers at our house. One was for my ladies group of Emmaus chicks. It's the local group of women who have all been on the Walk to Emmaus. Normally we meet each Thursday at a restaurant, or occasionally at a church or someone's home if we're making agape gifts for a walk. But with us getting the finishing touches on the house, both Tommy & I wanted to host some parties at our home. So I had about 25 people here in the middle of December. We played an ornament exchange game, had tons of food & good fellowship. It was so awesome & I was so blessed to have everyone here.

The very next night, we hosted our church's community group here. Unfortunately, three of the couples couldn't come, but of the three couples we had here, I think we all had a great time. We've grown really close to some of these people, and I guess, as our group has grown & there are basically just three of us couples who have been here all along, those other two couples were so good to us when I was injured & not able to get around back in the summer... I just wanted to do something for them. So for this gathering, I didn't ask anyone to bring food. Tommy & I did all the cooking. It turned out great.

I used quite a few recipes I'd found on Pinterest, and they were a hit. I did a lot of cooking for my Emmaus group too, but did ask for the ladies to bring something to share because I was afraid of not having enough. Man! We had a TON of food!!

During all of this, Tommy & I had been working with the First Touch group at church. This is the group that includes the ushers, parking lot guys and the greeters who are stationed not only at the doors, but all through the outer area before you get to the auditorium. I love doing this except for one thing... it means we miss out on the first of the worship service. But still, I love it. I get to see people that I normally don't, which means a lot in a church as big as ours. The last Sunday we worked, I got to see two people I'd gone to high school with that I hadn't seen in ages!!

So God kept us very busy with those things and with doing the Advent devotionals we did corporately with our church. That helped a lot and I'm so thankful that we stuck with it this year. We kinda failed big time last year!

We did spend about $50 on very small gifts for our kids & parents & I'd bought a couple of things earlier in the year for my sister & her husband, so we weren't completely empty handed, which is what I HATE, especially with my parents because my mom always buys such nice things for everyone.

She & dad gave us all some money as well, which was really REALLY nice and put both Tommy and me on eBay looking for things we wanted.

For him it was all kinds of light-weight backpacking equipment for the trip he and our boys are planning for later this year. For me? Well, I have wanted to get some Thirty-One bags for eons. I even thought about hosting a party, but I HATE doing those buy-something deals. I don't go to them because I can't afford to buy stuff, so I figure most people are likely in the same situation. I also wanted to find a really good leather purse. Well, I went over my Christmas-cash budget, but thankfully I have Bill Me Later & could go ahead and get not one, but but SEVERAL of EACH of these wish-list items!!

God's so good, isn't He?? :)

I got one Dooney & Bourke all leather drawstring bag in excellent condition for several hundred dollars less than it would have cost new. I got one of those huge 31 Weekender totes, brand-new in the package AND in that new purple paisley pattern I love! Not only that, but I saved over $30 off retail. I dunno why someone wasn't pleased with this as a gift, but I am thrilled with my purchase! I also got a barely-used All In One Organizing totes to hold all the things we need to keep in the truck. It's in a nice discontinued pattern with the snowy pine trees? I wiped a couple of smudged out of the inside & it looks like new. Saved a TON on it, too. Then I found another 31 Large Utility tote in the brown dot pattern. And I unexpectedly won another Dooney & Bourke bag that should be here any day. It's almost like new too and I only gave $30-something for it. It's all leather & looks great.

Now my problem will be being seen with the aforementioned 31 bags by the ladies I know who are 31 reps. *sigh* I'm thinking about posting a status on facebook explaining what I've done. I mean, c'mon, how can anyone fault me for buying these things used &/or for WAY less than retail? Hopefully, no one, but we'll see. *sigh* I can't let that worry me right now.

Well, I think that's it for me for right now. I'm going to try to upload some pix of the stuff we've got finished around the house. I absolutely LOVE my new green walls in the family room. It's got such a warm cozy feel now and the redo of the mantle is just awesome! Hang tight... I'll get some pix up ASAP!!

hugs~

fishy...

Okay, so this post is not one I was expecting to write. It's not something I was pondering til it hit me in the face. It will be a rambling, thinking-it-over, pondering post. So don't say I didn't warn you. *heh*

We were recently asked to become "leaders" of the community group (small group, similar to a Sunday school class) at the church we've been at for about a year now. The reason is because the guy who had been leading it simply didn't show up when groups resumed after summer break. Two other couples and us showed up for the first, along with another TWO couples who joined us to discuss the questions that are provided. No definite "leader" was necessary, it was a great group-participant discussion.

The next week, a different new couple showed up and we had another great group discussion. Another lady & I questioned each other as to what was up with this couple not showing. No emails, no contact with the guy who oversees all the groups & keeps a list of them. Nothing.

So, I decided we needed to get to the bottom of it, mostly notably because the second night, there was a different group listed as meeting in the room we've used for the past year. I emailed the care pastor, who forwarded it to the fella who "manages" groups. I told them we were having some great meetings, but were concerned since everyone except us thought that we no longer have a group. I told him we had taken care of the no-leader problem by instituting a last-one-in-leads policy. (which we sort-of had, albeit jokingly) And that this had resulted in a race between two of our men while the third was in the facilities. (lol!) All of it was in good humor and such, I just let them know we wanted to continue having our group & asked what we should do.

The reply I got from Group Manager Man was Congratulations! We, my husband and I, were now listed as the group's leaders. WHAT!?!?! I was surprised & my husband was terrified! I insisted that our group was full of great communicators & basically everyone participates in discussion, so we didn't need to necessarily have a leader. But he insisted that the group must have someone "on record" as leaders, more for contact than anything else. And so, that's how it happened.

The first night after this happened, we had yet another new couple and that was all. Thankfully, we'd spoken to the other two core couples & knew why they weren't there. Otherwise, we'd both have been terribly upset that none of them came!! We had a really wonderful time & my husband handled the whole thing well & started to feel better about the situation.

Thank God.

Then... I just by chance found out that there had been an email sent around by the man who had been the group leader. We had not got a copy of it, however. A friend forwarded it to me, and I have to say I was pretty taken aback by it.

It said he had thought & prayed long & hard about it, and decided to not lead a group this year. This is almost a month since groups had started back up. We all know that another guy, who had been in the group last year with his wife, had been trying to contact this former leader, so I assume that's why this email was sent all of a sudden. He'd sent it to the whole list of people who'd participated in group last year... except us.

There was no mention of the group still being active or anything. He encouraged people to find other groups to attend, if they hadn't already.

Hmm... so now it gets awkward. Why, if he was so torn up about stepping down as leader did he wait til now to send such an email, at least to part of the group?? I know this is because the one man had just started trying to reach him with the news.

Also, why did another couple who were in the group last year tell someone that this former leader had told them group wouldn't start til after Labor Day??

What on earth is going on??

I honestly don't know, but it makes me feel weary. This man is a rather well-off individual whose family owns a large business. Is it all just about politics?? I know that there was a fire at one of their homes earlier (yep, I said "one of"), so I know that what he said about having a rough time of it lately is true... but why wait? Why tell part of the people that group would start later than the designated time? Why not say that the group is still active? I don't mean that he should have said we are the new "leaders", but why not at least say that the "old group" is still running? Still meeting in the same place, at the same time?


Why???? That seems to be the million-dollar question. I just pray that I can not dwell on this or concoct scenarios about what is going on, about who said what to whom & when... I want to focus on Jesus since He, after all, is the reason there's any group at all.

Lord, please help me focus on You!!!

the hard things

Sometimes it's REALLY hard to do the things you need to or should do. Like for instance we have recently left the church we've belonged to for over 14 years. And this isn't the first time we've left there.

The first time was when Corey, our eldest, was about to graduate over into the "teen group" at church. The fella in charge of the teens at that time was a divorcee with small children. He was nice enough, but I had problems with the fact that they let him mentor the teenagers, besides the fact that they'd let him preach too. (See I Timothy 3:2 for the reasons why this is wrong) But beyond that, I knew because Tommy and I were game leaders and had interaction with all of the kids, that there had to be some problems with what the teens were being taught from the behavior we saw out of them. One girl had come up to Tommy and done this stretchy sort of "dance" in front of him! On several other occasions we heard two or three of the girls talking about another in a pointedly loud way so that she could hear. And none of what they said was nice.

Of course, all that stuff could be attributed to how they were being raised, so even though we weren't comfortable with the man, we hadn't decided to leave then. However, when I came out after youth classes one night and found one of the teen girls on this "preacher's" back, arms and legs wrapped around him?? Well, THAT was the deciding factor. We took it to two different deacons and prayed. When the deacons took it to the pastor, he blew it off, so we promptly left.

What followed was about two years of going to just about every baptist church in our county and several in other counties, a short stint in one church where we were taken advantage of and used and then another horrible few months where the church almost broke up our marriage. Yes, you read that right. Maybe I'll go into that sometime but I don't feel up to it right now. I'll just give you these: legalistic, judgmental, false doctrine.

So anyhow, we ended up going back to this church after all that turmoil and the divorced preacher was no longer there, but we never knew for sure if he left on his own or was finally put out. But anyhow, we've been back there for almost 10 years I guess, and things are still just "not right". And it's hard to leave because having a church home is like having a regular home! It's where you know people that care about you, help you with your problems, where you feel comfortable and can best worship and serve the Lord. But when there's something just "wrong" in the leadership, it makes the church "sick". When there are favored "cliques" in the church, when the preaching is no longer solely or consistently to honor God, but sometimes turns into a rant or some private tongue lashing for certain members... then the Lord is anything but glorified or honored.

Part of what we love about the church is that the old hymns are sung there. And we used to really love the preaching. Granted, I know the pastor is getting older and that probably has a little to do with the changes in his preaching, but the other, behind-the-scenes things we see out of him and his wife have nothing to do with age.

You see, Corey was kind of trained in how to run the media for the church... do the directing and editing for the services to be aired on tv. He loves that kind of stuff and has brought the program a long way from what it had been after the not-exactly-assistant pastor left. (long story, but they never called him as assistant pastor, but that's the capacity he worked in most of the time, other than he was given no authority. They really did treat him pretty bad once he announced that he was leaving, though) So now Corey is doing the entire media thing himself. The pastor, I guess, thought he'd keep Corey from asking for more money or equipment ?? but a man who had worked with the media at another church started coming and pastor asked him to sit in a see what Corey was doing. The man told him he was doing the work of about five people and he wouldn't touch it with a 10-foot pole!! Yeah... and for over three years now, my son has sat in a room directing church services. He hasn't participated in a worship service in all that time. The only time he and his wife have been able to attend church together is when they took off and went somewhere else. There's one other lady that used to work with that stuff back when there was MUCH less of it, and she fills in for him once in awhile when he has to be gone. But she can't edit and it's a lot more work for him to have to edit what she directs... Anyway, my big problem with all this is that not once has the leadership ever thought that maybe, just maybe Corey and the other KIDS who run the cameras might want to actually sit in a service instead of having to work through it. Trust me, it's not as simple as you'd think and it is in NO WAY the same as being there. There is NO WAY one can "get" what they need from a sermon when they're running a camera or directing. To my mind, you can correct me if I'm wrong, but seems that the leadership should be concerned enough about these people's spiritual needs enough to make sure there is somehow they can at least occasionally get fed. But they don't, they haven't and I can't see that changing any time soon.

And so we've left this very much old-fashioned church steeped in tradition and very set in the old ways. Not that we have ONE SINGLE THING against that. We don't and matter of fact, that's the reason we loved the church to begin with... it wasn't trying to be all modern and contemporary. But somewhere along the line the keeping with tradition has turned into more like being critically judgmental of anyone who isn't doing what pastor and the elect think they should. It's not quite as overt as that sounds, but the fact remains that this is exactly what's going on there.

I didn't plan for this to be about "what's wrong" with the church, but more about the huge difference and big change we've made. So, this new church? Well, it's grown from a church that's been around for quite a long while. They got a young pastor and suddenly the started just bursting at the seams... literally! They abandoned the original church house and started holding services in the convention center in town and finally built a new facility. But it's about as non-traditional and modern as you can get! However, it's not like most churches attempt this. I'll see if I can explain.

Most of the time when you find a church that's trying to be more contemporary, they're mainly trying to attract people. They will start doing different music, which none of the older people like usually. They'll come up with snazzy-sounding names for jazzed up programs for young people and they'll try to seem less "churchy". They totally lose focus of what the real issue is, and that's reaching the community for Jesus.

Somehow, this new church has totally reworked itself without seeming like "that kind" of church. They don't have a traditional altar with a pulpit. It's a stage, actually, with two huge screens on either side that show what the media ministry is recording. The pastor sits on a stool beside a small table. He has all his scripture projected onto a smaller screen that is rolled in beside him. His points are also put there. And recently, he's begun putting his sermon notes and scriptures on YouVersion so that you can use your phone or iPad to take notes and such. The music is anything but traditional. It's straight out of the Christian Pop/Rock genre, complete with drums, several electric guitars and keyboards. There are colored lights that sometimes move around and occasionally, they will use smoke, too. It's set up just like a concert. O.o There are no pews. Just rows of seats and the "auditorium" is quite dark during the song portion and only slightly lit during the sermon.

It is THE TOTAL OPPOSITE of the church we belong to. Do we like all these things? Not completely, no. I miss singing in the choir, I miss the traditional hymns. I miss Sunday School (the new church has two morning services and then "community groups", which is like SS, in the evening). But I DON'T miss leaving church feeling worse than when I came in and that's what's been happening at our old church.

The leadership, from the top down, has become very prideful, as best I can tell. There's no real love for people, no real concern for their needs. There are literally over 100 kids who regularly come to the youth program mid-week. There's no real budget for providing for the needs of that program. The man put in charge seems to be just the first one they could get to say yes, and he is the most ill-equipped man to deal with a bunch of rowdy, mostly-ADD-type kids. He has zero patience, by his actions and his own admission, and no love for those kids. Nobody wants to take responsibility for anything or take credit for it all, accordingly. It's just ridiculous and we just didn't feel like we could continue to support the situation.

Is this the church we want to permanently move to? I don't think so, but maybe. Right now, we're dealing with my parents, who also belong to the same church as us, feeling as if we've jumped ship. As if we've lost our minds and gone "radical", like we've abandoned the Bible or something. It hurts, especially when they don't know everything. We've been contacted by all of one person from church. A good friend of Tommy's and a deacon. He seemed maybe a little betrayed. At least that's how he came across. Other people on facebook have asked if we're okay, about three people, I think. Out of a congregation of over 300?

*sigh* It's just been a rough month. I just want to do what's pleasing to the Lord. I don't want to make a decision that's out of His will for us, or to hurt anyone's feelings, but something had to happen. We'd been hurting and worrying and being dissatisfied with how people were being treated. We had to make a change. Lord willing we'll have a clear answer as to what we're to do.